Early to bed and early to rise makes you really boring

Okay, I have ideas for blogs again, and everything is good with the world. Hey, wanna know something interesting... the word 'blog' is actually red-flagged by this dealie's spell check. That's right. The website devoted to THE BLOG doesn't recognize it as a word. Kinda idiotic. Now without further ado I give you... 'why I wanna be a cartoon':
Every problem is solved in half an hour, well, twenty-two minutes if you want to be precise. I mean, there is the rare continuation, but in general, you can accidently kill the last panda on the planet, run away from angry hill-billies, be reunited with your estranged uncle, all in time to finish your school assignment, and win Little Miss Know it all America! Wow, that would be the greatest story line ever... hmm. They don't have any real problems to begin with. The only downside to all of this is that you never gain any ground with your character development. You never change, learn anything, mostly because these shows need to exist independent in themselves, so no major changes can occur, aside from the drawing getting less crappy as time goes on.
Next, you never age. I mean, this would suck if you started off as an old fogey that basic yells at kids all the time, while hurling cats at them, but if you start of in grade two, that's where you end each and everyday. You can be young forever, and never have any real consequences.
You can wear the exact same thing everyday, and the same hairstyle! Yes, how many hours and moneys do we throw away on the latest fashion, hair-stuffs, or time required to pick out our outfit for the day (provided your parents no longer do this for you). Best of all, it isn't weird that this happens. In fact, it would be kinda creepy if you didn't wear the same thing, mostly since in crappily drawn cartoons, it may be your only distinguishing feature.
Just think of all the fun you can have mocking the obvious stereotypes that exist in the surrounding society. I mean you have the dumb donut eating cop, the corrupt mayor, the immigrated shop-keeper, and dumb jocks. Yes, stereotypes are a great thing. As I look around I wish that life were more like that, it would make everything fairer. For example, you wouldn't have all of these good-looking smart people. Either you're dumb and so much so that you don't realize it, but very attractive, or smart but not exactly the best looking person. Basically it evens it out, so that you aren't hot and smart, the best of both worlds, or dumb and ugly, and most likely attempting to slit your wrists from the continual disappointments of life (... with the flow, not across).
We would also live the stereotype lives with the best friend, family of five, crazy Grandparents, and all the fun that comes with the typical Americanized life. Hence we would all be driving fatty-mobiles, this would be a drawback. Nothing outside of the city limits would matter and we would be totally unaware of any globabl events, or anything aside from the big county fair fast approaching. Okay, so it is kinda dull, but everyone is stupider in cartoons, as such it would be amusing enough.
Another crappy part of all of this is the stereotypical 'bad guy'. I'm not much into wearing all black or petting hairless cats, so this might be difficult. I guess so long as I don't have to be a stereotypical character, but still surrounded by idiots to manipulate for my own bidding... wait, suddenly reality doesn't seem that bad, um, actually never mind about that last part... you heard nothing, deny deny deny, then lie.
The greatest thing about living in a cartoon world is that you can do anything you want without consequence. I can get, say, angry at a bus driver (not that this would ever occur in real life) find out where he lives, leave an orphaned puppy on his front step in a basket (one of those cute dogs like in 'Fraiser' with the tongue hanging out and the bug brown eyes), wait a few months as he and his family take it in and love it, then punt it off a bridge. See and I wouldn't have PETA at my door, picketing and throwing bananas at me while wearing fig leaves, nor would I be picked up by the cops. Nope, in cartoon world it would all end well and probably entertain a few people along the way. Or I could just punt one of his kids... no, I guess that sounds worse... maybe. But I would never do this in the real world. It just wouldn't end well.
Ah, life without consequences, that would be great. But unfortunately I don't live like that, not yet anyway, maybe when I take over the world and all of you are my minions. I do love my minions, and masses, can't forget the masses. Well I'm sure I'll be reamed out for that puppy comment, just to stress it again, I'M NOT INTO KICKING PUPPIES, NOR WOULD I EVER KICK A PUPPY.
I'll get you next time Gadget... next time!...