FINE!

My title is actually two-fold today. That’s right, you get two rants for the price of one. But wait, order now and I’ll throw in a free horoscope. Yup. A $1,000,000.00 value all for the low low price of 100,000,000 installations of one penny! I should really get paypal.

Alright. So what am I yelling about today? Well despite the two separate topics, the nitty-gritty of the whole thing is my effort to avoid technology seeing as how it doesn’t really save time, money, or effort, but in fact will cost you dearly in these categories. Woohoo.

You may be a long time reader and are already familiar with a common theme that I’ve developed over the duration of this blog, but I think I’ve finally come to terms with the whole thing. First off, I’m a geek. I don’t want to be, but I know I am. Like intelligence I believe that there are several types of geekiness. For example, VanGogh, DaVinci, and Gretzky (Augh I hate MSWord, it doesn’t recognize VanGogh or DaVinci as words but it doesn’t question Gretzky, sick), anyway there are all comparable in terms of intelligence. They may not all have a high IQ but physical and artistic intelligence are just as valued, and as such all are quite gifted in their own way. This is my way of saying that I’m no ham radio grocery store variety geek, I do fall into the car geek area, but unfortunately, more and more, I’m becoming a run of the mill geek. Yup, you got it, rant number one: I’m updating my blog.

Not only that, I’m also checking my email, although no one really mails me, and I’m subscribed to online type radio dealies. It’s bad, I know. Not only do I worry about one blog, I have many, too many really, but being paranoid, I find the encouragement to continue in the slim chance of anyone checking out what I have to say. I mean I really don’t have anything else to do tonight, but I should still be sleeping, as I’m fairly tired from pimpin’ out a Neon at work today. It’s a tough job being the token female.

So yes, that was rant numero uno. It was short, but I think I’m in a short mood today. Oh, I also tried on bathing suits and discovered that I’m not tall in the slightest. It was pretty depressing and I can’t wear a bikini, but now it’s over, and on with the show…

Rant ni: (this means ‘two’ in another language. Really. It’s Japanese I think.) I was excited about an FM transmitter. For those of you how are now lost, as my father was when I had to explain the technological contortionist-like maneuvers I would have to procure to score a cheap MP3 player in my car… you plug a yoyo-shaped object into anything with a headphone jack and BINGO – it plays on the radio. Not every radio, just ones that are close by. Okies, not a big deal, well until I thought – hey, Carly, you know what would be spiffy? Using this on your Palm Pilot. Then you can watch Civic commercials with surround sound and listen to the 500ish songs on your card. Hmm, that would be pretty spiffy but would bring you dangerously close to putting tape on the nose bar of your glasses…

And as we all know, this wasn’t enough. My Palm pilot, as much as I love the lil’ guy, likes his power, so then I needed a car adaptor, and then something to hold it so it doesn’t fly around the car while I’m driving (hey – it could happen) and then batteries for the FM dealie, and songs that don’t suck (which is what I’m still hard at work with). So here I am, in front of a glowing white screen, loving the things that make my life extra miserable and even going so far as to contemplate signing up for the rest of my courses this year. No, we just aren’t on good enough terms yet.

I know that one day we’ll all be slaves to our evil computer overlords when we fully surrender independence and forget how to breathe on our own or maybe we’re just too lazy too. But hey – we’re still in the ‘friends with money stage’, you know the one, everyone really hated little Ralph but we all hung out with him and his sister Heather because their parents bought them go-carts and a pony, but one day they’ll both realize the truth and hire hitmen to take care of some childhood chums, but until then, meh, may as well enjoy the free ride while it lasts.